What Is Love Bites About?
The premise of Love Bites in 258 words, with nothing given away. The full story follows below.
In a whimsically haunted suburb, an aging crypt lies concealed behind a fireplace, bridging centuries of darkness with the bright, humming world of refrigerators, electric lights and talking cars. The house that shelters this secret is a modest, present‑day home that feels both ordinary and oddly charged, hinting that the past has never truly been buried.
Zachary Simms awakens after a century‑long slumber, bewildered by the modern comforts that greet him and fascinated by the pulse of contemporary life. A vampire with a long, tangled history, he carries the weight of old‑world myth while cracking jokes about the marvels of pizza and spaghetti. His curiosity about humanity is matched only by a lingering yearning for connection that the new era seems to tease.
Kendall Gordon is a pragmatic, independent woman who has long resisted the conventional expectations of marriage, yearning for something—or someone—truly extraordinary. Her life is suddenly intersected by Zachary’s dark charm, sparking a friendship that quickly tips toward something deeper. Meanwhile, Dwight Putnam, a well‑meaning but overly persistent suitor, circles the couple, providing a comic counterpoint that highlights the unlikely love triangle forming under the same roof.
Against this backdrop of quirky modernity and lingering gothic allure, the story follows Zachary as he seeks a path back to humanity, hoping that love might be the catalyst for his transformation. With Kendall’s tentative aid and the everyday absurdities of the present world pressing in, the film balances romance, humor, and the timeless question of whether a creature of the night can ever truly belong to the daylight.
What Happens in Love Bites?
The complete story of Love Bites, from the first scene to the last, in 705 words (about 3 minutes). Spoilers throughout. Names in the text link to 5 cast member pages.
Spoilers ahead
Dwight Putnam Roger Rose has just asked Kendall Gordon Kimberly Foster for the 10th time to marry him, but Kendall is still unwilling to commit. She believes the perfect man for her is still out there. Vampire Zachary Simms Adam Ant has just awakened in his coffin from a 100-year sleep in the crypt under Kendall’s house and comes out through the secret door in her fireplace to face the brave, new world. When the two meet, it isn’t quite love at first bite, but Zachary spends the next day in her bed anyway. This angers Dwight when he tries to make a move on Zachary, thinking the lump under the covers is Kendall.
It doesn’t take long before Kendall and Zachary become friends, and Zachary tells her how he came to be a vampire. He was born in England in 1660 and moved to Boston in 1675. In 1688, he was bitten by a vampire named Nerissa Michelle Forbes, and they lived together for 100 years before she suddenly decided to run off with a Washington politician. Zachary pined for Nerissa for the next one hundred years and finally decided to sleep it off. Unfortunately, he forgot to wake up until another one hundred years had passed.
Zachary is entranced by devices such as refrigerators, electric light bulbs, and cars that talk. He is also entranced by Kendall, and before long, they are a twosome. Zachary decides to end his existence as a vampire and asks Kendall to help him in “reviving his digestive system” so that he can eat human food. Before long, Zachary is slurping down spaghetti and munching on pizza. When he finds that he has a blood pressure, can go outside in the daytime, and drinking blood makes him gag, he proclaims himself rehumanized. Everything is going great, until 1) Zachary lands a job with Dwight’s insurance firm, 2) Dwight hires Vinnie Helsting Philip Bruns to do a little detective work on Zachary, and 3) Nerissa shows up wanting Zachary back.
Zachary starts working the night shift in the data entry department. One night he discovers $1,300,000 that has been moving from department to department in small increments. Dwight rewards him for his find by making him an executive vice president and giving him a company car. Within a short time, Zachary is using his bloodthirsty skills to put the bite on potential clients, proving that he can make a killing in the business. Unfortunately, he’s spending less and less time with Kendall and becoming more and more of a yuppie. When Zachary suggests to the board of directors a plan that will increase their profits 30% each year for 100 years, they make him chief executive officer of the company, which effectively puts Dwight out of a job.
While Zachary is rapidly moving up the ladder, Helsting can’t find anything on him. No birth certificate, no credit cards, no paper trail, so he begins tailing Zachary wherever he goes, taking photographs, and casing the house Zachary shares with Kendall. One night, when no one is home, Helsting enters the house, notices the secret door in the fireplace, and discovers the crypt and Zachary’s coffin. While there, he overhears Zachary’s message machine taking a phone call. > Hello. I can’t come to the phone right now. I’m dead. Then Nerissa comes on, warning Zachary to be careful so that Dwight doesn’t find out what Zachary really is. Helsting puts two and two together and figures it out…Zachary is a vampire.
It looks like Zachary is about to be defanged. Dwight wants his business back. Kendall says Zachary was more human when he was a vampire and wants him out of her life. Nerissa says that the only solution is to “revamp” him, so she gets the process started by biting him on the neck. Dwight takes back his business, setting up Zachary as a consultant with a perpetual income that will make him rich for centuries. Kendall informs Zachary that she is pregnant with his baby and agrees to allow him to “vampirize” her when the baby is old enough to understand. Nerissa agrees to become the baby’s godmother and buy her pretty dresses and take her to Mets night games.
Love Bites Timeline: Every Key Event in Order
15 key events in the order they happen, from “Dwight proposes to Kendall (tenth time)” to “Kendall reveals pregnancy and plans vampirization for the future”. 15 events name a place, across 5 locations.
- 1
Dwight proposes to Kendall (tenth time)
Dwight Putnum asks Kendall Gordon to marry him for the tenth time, but Kendall remains unwilling to commit. She still believes the perfect man is out there somewhere. The moment sets up the central tension around romance and choice.
When:present day Where:Kendall's house
- 2
Zachary awakens from a century-long sleep
Zachary Simms emerges from his coffin in the crypt beneath Kendall's house, climbing out through a secret door in the fireplace. He faces a brave, new world with curiosity and a hint of danger. This awakening marks the start of his new life in Kendall's orbit.
When:immediately after awakening Where:crypt under Kendall's house
- 3
First meeting and shared bed
When Zachary and Kendall meet, it isn't love at first sight, but they end up spending the next day in Kendall's bed. The scene establishes their unusual bond and sparks a new dynamic between mortal and immortal. The day deepens their connection.
When:the following day Where:Kendall's house
- 4
Zachary reveals his century-long backstory
Zachary tells Kendall about his life: born in England in 1660, moved to Boston in 1675, and bitten by Nerissa in 1688. He describes a century with Nerissa and the long sleep that follows. The tale explains his strange perspective on time and humanity.
When:early in their friendship Where:Kendall's house
- 5
Zachary discovers modern technology
Kendall introduces Zachary to refrigerators, electric lights, and cars that talk, marveling at how different the world is from his century past. He is enthralled by these devices and the pace of modern life. The sequence highlights his fascination with everyday human conveniences.
When:early in their friendship Where:Kendall's house
- 6
Zachary becomes 'rehumanized' and eats real food
Zachary decides to end his vampirism and asks Kendall to help him become capable of eating human food. He samples spaghetti and pizza and even experiences daylight without the old fears. He proclaims himself 'rehumanized' as the changes take hold.
When:soon after Where:Kendall's house
- 7
Zachary lands a job at Dwight's firm
Zachary begins working the night shift at Dwight's insurance company, leveraging his fresh, reformulated life to fit into the corporate world. His rising competence makes him a valuable asset to Dwight's operation. The move foreshadows how far his ambition will carry him.
When:after rehumanization Where:Dwight's insurance firm
- 8
Vinnie Helsting is hired to investigate Zachary
Dwight hires Vinnie Helsting to dig into Zachary's past, hoping to uncover any clues about his unusual status. Helsting begins tailing Zachary and gathering photographs and records. The probe sets the stage for the conflict over Zachary's true nature.
When:shortly after Zachary's hiring Where:Dwight's firm
- 9
Nerissa returns to reclaim Zachary
Nerissa arrives, warning Zachary's enemies not to reveal what he truly is and signaling that she intends to reclaim him. Her return introduces a rival vampire angle and intensifies Kendall's dilemma. The elder vampire's presence upends the fragile balance between mortal loyalty and immortality.
When:mid-story Where:Kendall's house
- 10
Zachary uncovers a vast cash movement
One night, Zachary discovers $1,300,000 moving from department to department in small increments, a clue to a broad financial scheme. Dwight rewards his discovery by elevating him within the firm. The incident cements Zachary's value and accelerates his ascent.
When:one night Where:Dwight's firm
Show the other 5 events of Love Bites Hide the last 5 events
- 11
Zachary becomes EVP and gets a company car
To reward his findings, Dwight promotes Zachary to executive vice president and provides him with a company car. He begins using his power to influence clients and profits. The elevation marks his growing control over the company.
When:after the promotion Where:Dwight's firm
- 12
Zachary pitches a century-long profit plan and becomes CEO
Zachary suggests a plan to raise profits by 30% each year for 100 years, and the board makes him CEO, effectively pushing Dwight out. His new role cements his authority and his willingness to gamble with the company’s future. The move showcases his rapid, unorthodox ascent into power.
When:later Where:Boardroom
- 13
Helsting discovers the secret door and Zachary's coffin
Helsting finds the secret door in the fireplace, enters the house, and spots Zachary's coffin, then overhears a voicemail that hints at his undead status. He pieces together that Zachary is a vampire. The revelation threatens to expose Zachary's true nature.
When:after investigation Where:Kendall's house
- 14
Nerissa bites Zachary to revamp him
Nerissa begins the revamp by biting Zachary on the neck, triggering a supernatural transformation that renews his vampire essence in a modified form. Dwight regains control of the company as Zachary's fate becomes intertwined with Nerissa's plans. The bite sets up a new, uncertain future for Zachary and Kendall.
When:after Nerissa's arrival Where:Kendall's house
- 15
Kendall reveals pregnancy and plans vampirization for the future
Kendall tells Zachary she is pregnant with his child and agrees to allow vampirization when the baby is old enough to understand. Nerissa is named the baby's godmother and will take her to Mets night games. The ending hints at a blended future where vampirism and humanity coexist through their child.
When:toward the end Where:Kendall's house
Who Are the Main Characters in Love Bites?
5 characters, among them Zachary Simms (Adam Ant), Kendall Gordon (Kimberly Foster) and Dwight Putnam (Roger Rose): who each one is and the part they play in the story. Every profile links to the actor’s page.
- ZS
Zachary Simms (Adam Ant)
Played by Adam Ant
A centuries-old vampire awakened in modern Boston who is fascinated by technology and human conveniences. He longs to belong to ordinary life while struggling with an ancient hunger, and he forms a complex romance with Kendall. His journey from predator to 'rehumanized' figure drives the central tension between desire, ethics, and ambition.
- 🧛 vampiric
- 💼 corporate
- 💞 romantic
- KG
Kendall Gordon (Kimberly Foster)
Played by Kimberly Foster
An independent woman who resists Dwight's marriage proposal but is drawn to Zachary. Her relationship with the vampire leads to a surprising pregnancy, challenging her sense of self and her future. She embodies modern womanhood, navigating love, commitment, and personal choice in a world of fantasy and finance.
- 💖 love
- 🏃♀️ independence
- 👶 pregnancy
- DP
Dwight Putnam (Roger Rose)
Played by Roger Rose
Kendall's fiancé and a powerful corporate figure who resents Zachary's rise. He becomes a foil to the vampire's ambitions, using pressure and influence to regain control of the company. His pursuit creates the human obstacle that tests loyalty, trust, and ambition in a high-stakes modern world.
- 💼 power
- 🛡️ control
-
Nerissa (Michelle Forbes)
Played by Michelle Forbes
An ancient vampire who initially turned Zachary and later re-enters the scene to reclaim him. She exudes danger and cunning, yet her alliance with Zachary's fate is charged with long-dormant emotions. Nerissa's interference complicates the balance between friendship, vengeance, and immortality.
- 🧛 vampiric
- 🗺️ manipulation
- 🕊️ nostalgia
- VH
Vinnie Helsting (Philip Bruns)
Played by Philip Bruns
A detective hired to uncover Zachary's true identity, he follows a trail of clues and photographs that threaten Zachary's secret. His investigative drive adds tension and a procedural counterpoint to the supernatural drama. He represents the human need for truth in a world where legends hide in plain sight.
- 🕵️ detective
- 🧭 pursuit
Where and When Is Love Bites Set?
Love Bites is set in Kendall's house, Boston, Massachusetts and USA (Modern day). Here is why the time and place matter to the story.
When
Modern day
The story unfolds in the present era, complete with refrigerators, electric light, and talking cars. Corporate offices and city life anchor the narrative, highlighting how a centuries-old vampire adapts to contemporary society. The timeframe blends everyday modernity with timeless supernatural elements, creating a satirical yet romantic tone.
Where
Kendall's house, Boston, Massachusetts, USA
Most of the action centers on Kendall Gordon's house in Boston, a seemingly ordinary suburban home with a secret crypt beneath the fireplace where Zachary awakens. The setting expands to Dwight's insurance firm and other modern office spaces, grounding the vampire tale in a contemporary urban backdrop. The combination of domestic life and corporate environments fuels the movie's mix of romance, comedy, and supernatural intrigue.
- 🏠 Suburban home
- 🕳️ Hidden crypt beneath the fireplace
- 🗺️ Boston
- USA
What Are the Themes of Love Bites?
4 ideas the story keeps returning to, among them Immortality vs Humanity, Love Across Time and Power and Corporate Satire.
-
01
Immortality vs Humanity
Zachary's attempt to become 'rehumanized' probes the tension between eternal life and living as a mortal being. The film uses modern comforts to soften a predator, yet the pull of blood and centuries of instinct linger. Nerissa's schemes remind us that immortality carries moral and relational costs. The clash between vampire power and human affection runs through the narrative.
-
02
Love Across Time
Kendall's growing attraction to Zachary transcends centuries, forming a romance that challenges social expectations and personal safety. The unexpected pregnancy with Zachary's child deepens their bond and tests loyalty to friends and family. The relationship navigates the tension between romance, responsibility, and the fear of losing humanity. Humor and danger intertwine as love challenges vampire lore.
-
03
Power and Corporate Satire
Zachary's ascent to executive status satirizes profit-driven corporate culture and the lure of perpetual wealth. The boardroom becomes a battleground where immortality translates into influence, threatening to eclipse any semblance of humanity. The film uses this setting to critique ruthless ambition and the commodification of power. Humor emerges from vampire savvy colliding with office politics.
-
04
Secrets and Revelation
Helsting's probe uncovers the hidden crypt and Zachary's true nature, driving a suspenseful chase. Nerissa's warnings heighten the stakes and reveal the fragility of hidden histories. The pursuit exposes the fragile line between concealment and exposure in a world where the uncanny sits next to the everyday. Revelations propel the plot toward a decisive confrontation.
What Kind of Film Is Love Bites?
Light in tone, with steady pacing and a straightforward story, going by the plot summary.
- Tone
- Light
- Pacing
- Steady
- Story
- Straightforward
- Intensity
- Medium
- Ending
- Happy
A charmingly silly and lighthearted romantic comedy where a centuries-old vampire navigates modern life and corporate greed, leading to a whimsical tale of supernatural love and gentle satire.
- whimsical
- romantic
- comic
- quirky
- lighthearted
- fish-out-of-water
- vampire romance
- supernatural transformation
- corporate satire
- slapstick comedy
Quiz
How well do you remember Love Bites? Test yourself on the story.
